Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Pity Party

well i have to admit that i have been in a "mood" this week. i dont think having (what i think is) the stomach bug since sunday and my man out in the field for 4 1/2 days is helping either.

my DH and i have decided to do fertility treatments so i have been online doing research, going on forums, etc... and i feel more overwhelmed than when i started. before we got married i knew that i would need medical help and i was very clear about that before i furthered our relationship and of course he did not care if we would have kids or not, adoption or natural..he would love me no matter what!

so now we are at the point of trying to find the facilities that will be able to do certain procedures in the military. i found two but they are about 10 hours away (ggggreat) and then of course the cost is a big hurdle. but the most important hump is deployment! deployment isnt too far away and we would love to do this all before or at least get it started. UGH another thing to stress about!

im having a huge pity party here, feeling sorry for myself, being mad at all the pregnant women around me (10 mths since they came back from the last deployment), parents that piss me off when they dont take care of their children the way they should be treated (news, media stories, etc..) i'm sorry but some people have no business having kids! grrrrrrr!

i know we will one day have a child of our own, i know it will happen. i repeat, it will happen! but until then, i hope this pity party will end soon....

signed,
feeling sorry for myself

2 comments:

  1. I just started following you and boy do I feel you on everything you are saying.. we had 2 miscarriages last year and have been trying since to get preganat again but now he deploys in June and the new dr cant see me till middle of may.. deployments get in the way of life for sure

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  2. i am so sorry for your losses. i have so much going on with me, but the doctors do feel i am still able to conceive with help. i wish we could tell the doctors, "ok, i need to get pregnant this time cause he is deployed on this date and... " YET RIGHT! I wish!

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