..Rest & Recuperation

....Rest & Recuperation

...it was a wonderful 2 weeks of rest and recuperation. We did exactly what HE wanted and for that I am afraid there will be backlash for later.

...All he wanted to do was be home, he didn't want to travel, he didn't want to be around too many people, he didn't want to be forced to do anything he didn't want to do and I made sure he got what he wanted. He rarely drove-- which is ODD cause he loves his jeep but this time, he didn't want to. He was asked to "hang"out but he just didn't want to. He wanted to stay at home in the AC, be in the same room as me with his dogs at each side, watching his SYFY, Discovery, Military etc.. channels, being on his laptop downloading his stuff.... doing exactly what HE wanted to do.

...this rest and recuperation was much more different than last time. No traveling, No family, No rushing around here and there. I tried to get him to call his family, I tried to get him to hang with his buddies BUT he didn't want to. This time he slept in (which is very unusual), he did a few things around the house, went to game stop, the gun shop, and surplus stores a few times each. We went out to eat and watched movies several times. We were lazy around the house, in eachothers arms, watchin' Shark Week LOL... he sang karaoke and EVEN agreed to have pictures taken (which he hates by the way)...

...for all of that, I have no regrets. I know some will blame me. It's inevitable, I'm the other half, his side-kick, his wife... I hope all will understand that this deployment, this R&R is so much more different this time around. I feel like he is still healing and for some reason he is or has been withdrawing himself from things, discussions, friends and family. I am not sure if it is about not wanting to talk about certain things, not wanting to answer questions, to deal with "it?" I am not sure but I will not force it, otherwise he gets mad. so this time around we did what he wanted.

..it was the best 2 weeks. we both needed it.

..For Some Reason, Sundays make me miss him more

..for some reason Sunday's always make me miss him more always trying to keep myself so very busy and for some reason, Sunday's always seem to make me miss him more. it's more like Sunday blues. sleeping late, drinking coffee, watching movies, being lazy with our fur babies, snuggling and my glass of wine..... and missing my sweetheart.

..the more you do, the more you go..go..go..go...Then all of a sudden you eventually CRASH with emotions. go to my room and just have my own pity party. UGH

i do admit that i have become a disgruntled military wife where everything or everyone gets on my nerves or makes me mad with stupid comments. i do have to count to ten and to not punch somebody. its not their fault that "they" don't understand. kind of like i am going thru the 7 stages of deployment...

..rambling for the day #SCREAM

..haven't posted in awhile. let's see... work, nephew, out with the girls on a friday night, work, feed the nephew and so on and so on........

anybody get to a point in deployment where you want to just SCREAM at the top of your lungs? people get on my nerves, work is getting to me where i dont want to go anymore, certain friends who say they are your friends you just want to #slap, being away from your loved ones drives you crazy, not having a sex life (sorry tmi but DAMMIT), and not being able to lose this damn weight i have gained since we moved here. i feel like i am in a rut. stuck. time isnt going fast enough and it makes me want to #SCREAM.

i know i am not the only one that gets this way. but geeze. i gotta get outta this funk.

On a better note: Happy 236th Birthday Army! Hooah! Also, it's Flag Day!!!!

..Memorial Day

..well, it's Memorial Day weekend and I just don't have the "spirit" as everyone else does. I did get to leave work early and I did have happy hour drinks with my friend, but still no excitement about the extended weekend (yet). It will be 6 months without the love of my life and it has been taking a toll on my emotions. I miss him so very much and I "on purpose" did not make any big plans so I can relax this weekend. I wish I was home back in Texas with my loved ones. :(

I hope everyone remembers what this weekend, this Memorial Day is truly about. I think its great to have a extra day off work, some have a day off of school, great sales at the stores, bbq's, etc... Memorial Day Weekend, ask any Military Families who has lost a family member to a war or a person who has a loved one overseas and they will most likely tell you that Memorial Day is not a celebration. Its not a happy day. It was not intended to be the unofficial start to summer or a big day for race fans. Its a somber occasion meant to HONOR the men and women who have died in service for our country. GOD BLESS OUR TROOPS!

May Part 1

THIS IS WHAT I HAVE BEEN DOING FOR MAY SO FAR......

....in the Month of May, I have gone to a birthday party one of many with my Army Family, my very first Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs, participated in my first Relay for Life (crazy hat lap) and walked the 10K for the Red Cross (my 2nd 10K)!!!! And this is just the first part of the month! Can't wait to see what the second half has in store for me!

I am the Wife of an American Soldier